I have two appointments tomorrow at the Cleveland Clinic and there’s really no reason to, but I’m freaking out.
First, I see my Gynecologist. (Yeah, probably tmi but it’s no more than some of the other things I’ve shared.) It’s just my regular yearly appointment but ever since I did the Ancestry DNA, I realize how little, actually nothing, I know about my medical history. I know nothing of my biological mother’s side and since I don’t know who my biological father is, I don’t know anything from that side either. What scares me most about not know is how much could run in my family tree and I’ll never know it. Angelina Jolie knew she was at risk for the aggressive form of breast cancer so she had the double mastectomy. I can’t do any of that.
Then I go to Pain Management, and it’s silly for me to feel terrified, but I am. What if they don’t believe me? What if they think I’m simply a ‘drug seeker’, which couldn’t be further from the truth? What if they expect more from me than I’m physically capable of doing?
I’m terrified and I don’t know what to do or how to deal with everything I’m thinking and feeling. Here’s to making it out in one piece 😕